Don’t be yourself-Don’t be yourself I love the joke where a husband in a rare romantic moment leans over and softly whispers in his wife’s ear, “I’m the only one in your life, aren’t I?” The wife gently turns to look at her beloved man and with a smile on her face, whispers back, “Of course you are dear, all the others were nines and tens.” 😊 There’s the thought out there saying to ‘just be yourself,’ as if being yourself is the best you could be. The flaw in this view is the assumption there’s nothing about you that needs changing.… continue reading
Sarah-Sarah Several years ago I had the privilege of getting to know a couple who’d recently moved into the district to start a local business. This is an abbreviated version of a story they shared with me. Their daughter Sarah (not her real name) had been born with spina bifida and was not expected to live beyond her first few years. However, despite numerous operations and trips to hospital she defied those predictions Due of her condition, Sarah was not able to walk and became confined to a wheelchair. Sarah would often comment how she longed to run and play… continue reading
Thanks for the hand-Thanks for the hand I’m reminded or the joke about a person that was walking along the top of a high cliff admiring the view of the ocean as it stretched out into the distant horizon, when in a moment of distraction, they lost their footing and began to fall towards the rocks below. Thrusting out their hand in absolute panic they managed to grab hold of a small tree growing out from the baron cliff face. Hanging there, with no way up and only one way down the person in desperation cries out, “Help, is there anybody up there?”… continue reading
Thank goodness for Lighthouses-Thank goodness for Lighthouses The story is told of an American Navy ship sailing in thick fog during an exercise off the coast of England. Up ahead the battleship sees a light coming towards them. Fearing a collision, the ship’s captain gets the signal man to flash a signal to the approaching ship; “Sir, turn your ship 10 degrees south.” Up through the fog came back the signal; “No, you sir turn your ship 10 degrees north.” Well that made the captain angry as they moved closer to this collision. So, he sent a signal back; “I am an… continue reading
Turning down the heat.-Turning down the heat. Dad was forty-three and mum thirty-six when they married. I was their third child so dad was getting on in years when I came along. As a little kid I played schoolboy rugby on a Saturday. In all the time I played I only remember dad coming to watch me once. Looking back, it’s not hard to see dad’s love was expressed in how hard he worked trying to provide for us all. However, children are good absorbers of information but poor interpreters of that information and can easily come to wrong conclusion about themselves and… continue reading
We are all worth $10-We are all worth $10 If I held up a ten dollar note and asked the question, “Who can tell me what this is? And how much is it worth?” You would answer it’s a ten dollar note and its worth that because it comes from the Government printing press and has the Governor of the Reserve Banks signature on it. Now, if I threw the ten dollar note on the ground and stood on it how much would it be worth? The answer of course is still ten dollars. How about I screwed it up in my hand? or… continue reading
Trust-Over the years I’ve helped build a house or two. If I hadn’t done this, then one thing that wouldn’t be obvious, is just how much time and effort go into preparing the foundations for the house to sit on. You also realise that if you don’t do the necessary groundwork then in time cracks in walls and floors may appear. Poor workmanship, shortcuts, and inferior building materials will compromise the quality of the final product. It’s not hard to see this as a good analogy for developing a secure long-lasting relationship. Like the building process, if we don’t… continue reading
Golden Queen Peaches-I’m one of six boys in my family … no girls, Mum and Dad couldn’t afford daughters they were far too expensive. We lived in a two-bedroom house on a quarter acre section in a rural town in the Hawke’s Bay. As kids we were terrified of one of our neighbours, an old widow by the name of Mrs Jellico. We believed Mrs Jellico had an underground dungeon, where, if she got the chance, she would drag little boys, cut them up and eat them. (One of the older brothers most likely seeded that thought). Mrs Jellico had a beautiful… continue reading
You ain’t no ugly duckling-In the well-known children’s fable, 'The Ugly Duckling', when did the ugly duckling become a beautiful swan? The answer is that it always was a beautiful swan; it just didn’t recognise it, until it saw its own reflection. As we look at ourselves, many of us at best see a marred reflection of who we are really meant to be. I believe life’s great quest is to rediscover whose image we were created in. And then live in the dignity, freedom and potential that reclaiming this image makes available to us. Here are some thoughts that I hope might help… continue reading
Choices-I like the well-known story of an Indian brave who when facing a dilemma goes to the wise old Chief for advice. “It feels like there are two wild wolves fighting inside me,” he says. “One I know is good and wants to do what is right. The other is not good and wants to do what is wrong. Which wolf is going to win?” he asks. After pausing for a moment, the old Chief looks caringly at the young brave and… continue reading
Ouch…that hurt!!!-From a very young age we are taught about looking after our physical health. We are shown how to clean our teeth, wash our hands, the need for physical exercise and good personal hygiene and the like. All good things for sure. But when it comes to the area of our emotional health most of us have had very little guidance on how to care for ourselves. Our physical body indicates to us, via the pain senses, physical issues that we need to be aware of and address. For example, if I have a stone in my shoe… continue reading
Wilting fig leaves-A husband asked his wife one day, “How come you never seem to get upset and yell at me anymore when I do things you don’t like? “What is the secret?” Without hesitation the wife replied, “I have learned that whenever I feel my blood pressure going up, I just go and clean the toilet and almost straight away I find myself relaxing and feeling much better.” The husband thought for a while but couldn’t figure how cleaning a toilet would have that kind of an effect, so he asked her, “How does cleaning the toilet do that?” “That’s easy,”… continue reading
Wet Paint-I think a good illustration to represent what life’s about is the idea that when we are born we are handed a blank canvas a paint brush and all the paints we want and we’re told to go paint something with our life, and then at the end of our time here we present what we’ve painted to the one who handed the items to us in the first place. What I like about this view is it reminds me that I am the only one who ultimately chooses what my painting will finally look like …in other words, I… continue reading
Ouch…that hurt!!! - From a very young age we are taught about looking after our physical health. We are shown how to clean our teeth, wash our hands, the need for physical exercise and good personal hygiene and the like. All good things for sure. But when it comes to the area of our emotional health most of us have had very little guidance on how to care for ourselves. Our physical body indicates to us, via the pain senses, physical issues that we need to be aware of and address. For example, if I have a stone in my shoe… continue reading
Wilting fig leaves - A husband asked his wife one day, “How come you never seem to get upset and yell at me anymore when I do things you don’t like? “What is the secret?” Without hesitation the wife replied, “I have learned that whenever I feel my blood pressure going up, I just go and clean the toilet and almost straight away I find myself relaxing and feeling much better.” The husband thought for a while but couldn’t figure how cleaning a toilet would have that kind of an effect, so he asked her, “How does cleaning the toilet do that?” “That’s easy,”… continue reading
Wet Paint - I think a good illustration to represent what life’s about is the idea that when we are born we are handed a blank canvas a paint brush and all the paints we want and we’re told to go paint something with our life, and then at the end of our time here we present what we’ve painted to the one who handed the items to us in the first place. What I like about this view is it reminds me that I am the only one who ultimately chooses what my painting will finally look like …in other words, I… continue reading